When we notice the monologue in our head, reduce the intensity of the negative power and respect ourselves as a loyal friend with compassion, then we can begin to harness the true power of positive self-talk!
Harnessing self-talk
- Check-in and notice the ‘I am’ statements: we use I am statements often in our self-talk. If what you say after ‘I am…’ is positive and enhances your emotional state then keep using it. If what you are saying after the ‘I am…’ statement diminishes your emotional state then it is time to stop it! Saturate your ‘I am’ statements with optimism, energy and power.
- Contain the negativity: when we change the intensity of our self-talk, we take the impact or sting out of the negative power. For example, if we change ‘I can’t do this’ to ‘this is challenging right now’, or ‘this always happens to me’ to ‘what can I learn from this experience’? Or ‘I hate doing presentations’ to ‘what will it take to present the best version of me’. Reducing the power of the negative self-talk going on in our heads, will lessen, neutralise or even dissipate the impact mentally, physically and emotionally.
- Treat yourself like a friend: you wouldn’t say many of the phrases to a friend that you say to yourself, would you? Then why do it to yourself? The next time you begin engaging in negative self-talk, ask yourself – how you would feel if you heard someone saying that to a close friend or family member? It is unsupportive, demeaning and judgemental. We need to be more gracious and compassionate to ourselves. When we respect ourselves, we are less tolerant of negative self-talk and are much more vibrant when engaging in positive self-talk.